I NO LONGER LOVE YOU – THE RELATIONSHIP HAS RUN ITS COURSE is the No.2 Reason, according to our Solicitors, why couples split-up.
When a Marriage Has Run Its Course: Divorce in Later Life and the Importance of Pensions
For many people, the decision to divorce does not come after one dramatic event. It can come after years of growing apart, living separate lives under the same roof, or quietly realising that the marriage no longer offers companionship, support or a shared future. This is particularly common for older couples, whose children may have left home, whose working lives may be changing, and who may be asking themselves what they want the next stage of life to look like.
Divorce later in life is sometimes described as “grey divorce”, but behind that phrase are very personal decisions. Some couples reach retirement and find that the structure which held the relationship together — work, children, shared routines, financial pressures — has changed. Others may have spent many years prioritising family responsibilities and only later feel able to consider their own needs, wellbeing and independence.
Why someone may feel ready to divorce when the marriage has run its course
A person may decide to divorce because the relationship has become more like a practical arrangement than a marriage. They may no longer communicate meaningfully, share interests, or feel emotionally connected. In some cases, the couple may have stayed together for the sake of children, financial stability, family expectations or habit, but find that those reasons no longer feel strong enough to continue.
For older couples, there can also be a sharper sense that time matters. Retirement or approaching retirement may prompt difficult questions: Do I want to spend the next ten, twenty or thirty years in this relationship? Am I staying because I want to, or because leaving feels complicated? Would separation allow both of us to live more honestly and peacefully?
Why finances can be more complicated for older couples
Divorce is not only an emotional decision; it is also a financial one. For older couples, the financial issues can be particularly significant because there may be less time to rebuild savings, increase earnings or recover from an unfavourable settlement. Decisions about the family home, savings, investments and income need to be considered alongside retirement needs.
It is common for people to focus first on the house because it is visible, familiar and emotionally important. However, in many long marriages, pensions can be one of the most valuable assets, sometimes comparable to or greater than the equity in the family home. Ignoring pensions can leave one person with financial security in retirement and the other with a much weaker long-term position.
Why pensions matter more in later-life divorce
Pensions are often built up over many years of marriage. One spouse may have a substantial workplace pension, while the other may have taken time out of paid work, worked part-time, or earned less because they were caring for children or supporting the household. In those circumstances, pension provision can reflect the contributions both people made to the marriage, even if only one person paid directly into the pension scheme.
In England and Wales, pensions are usually considered as part of the overall financial settlement on divorce. They may be dealt with by a pension sharing order, where a percentage of one spouse’s pension is transferred to the other; by offsetting, where one person keeps more pension and the other receives more of another asset such as the home; or, less commonly, by a pension attachment arrangement. The right approach depends on the circumstances, the type of pensions involved and each person’s future needs.
One of the biggest risks is assuming that the figure provided by a pension scheme tells the whole story. Cash equivalent values can be useful, but they may not fully reflect the true worth of certain pensions, particularly defined benefit or public sector schemes. Older couples may therefore need specialist pension advice, and in some cases input from a pension on divorce expert, before agreeing how retirement assets should be divided.
Taking advice before making decisions
If a marriage has run its course, divorce may be a positive and considered step rather than a failure. It can allow both people to move forward with clarity, dignity and independence. However, later-life divorce should not be approached without careful thought about the financial consequences, especially pensions.
Anyone considering divorce in later life should take early legal advice so they understand their options before making firm decisions. A fair settlement is not just about meeting immediate needs; it is about ensuring that both people can plan realistically for retirement and the years ahead.
How to Make an Appointment to Discuss Your Situation with a Solicitor
At Lawson West we understand what couples are going through at every stage of separation. As members of Resolution, we are committed to a non-confrontational approach to family law issues that would produce better outcomes for separating families and their children. You can complete our Contact Form here, or you can call us on 0116 212 1000.
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This article: Created by AI and checked by a qualified solicitor. This article is intended as general commentary only and is not legal advice. Specific outcomes in family law depend on the facts of each case and the applicable law at the time.
